Because of you...

I'm tired of being judged so easily... of not being understood, of not even given a try. It hurts so much that I had friends who I really cared about and for an insignificant thing they turned their backs to me and now that it can't past unnoticed they don't have the guts to take their share of the responsability and it's me the one pointed out. It's so frustrating to know what really happened and even if you explain the situation it's like if your effort meant nothing... Nothing changes, now you're judged even harder, now besides being mean you are also cold, heartless, and why not? brainless too..

It hurts and is also so humiliating that a person you care so much can be part of that same situation... What is going on? When did the world get so twisted? Why is people guilty considered innocents? Why should innocents be judged? Why are friends letting you down? Why are enemies... no they will always be that way... however... Why stupid and idiot persons,that need to feel accepted, think they actually are accepted and now feel free to judge a situation that has nothing to do with them??? Why is unworthy people given credit when they don't even figure in the map to begin with... and this is just because the truely involved ones can't have the humility to say: " we are sorry, we never meant to turn our backs on you..." Why is this world full of cowards?

Why can't I trust someone I really cared for?? Why do I feel so bad??

Why do I get the feeling that in this world being a loyal, caring friend and above all being honest to your heart and moral ideas is simply not accepted anymore? Why do people wearing masks, people that can't be tolerated even among their kin rule now? When did love and manners lose power? When did my heart stop beating? When did my bruises ended up bleeding so badly that my body turned cold?

"I've learned the hard way to never let it get that far... Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me.. My heart can't possibly break when it wasn't even whole to start with..."

New radicals

Sushi yummy...

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"stay high..."

Don't forget me

I'm back!

My dear friend is here, and brought joy and happiness to me. We spoke as we used to speak so long ago, and suddenly the feeling that nothing has changed is still there... He is still that great person for whom I care so much, he still is that friend that will let me be part of his life and he still is a tremendous source of beautiful and pure feelings in me. I'm so glad to be able to have a person like him in my life and even happier to know he still wants to have someone like me in his.

Today I saw a movie and it made me think and feel a bit of melancholy.. It's called Can't be heaven. It made me think that if I died young... would I wait here for someone? or would anyone wait for me like it happened in that movie, would someone actually love me so much to wait for me and say: it's just can't be heaven if you're not there. And by this point maybe you can't figure out what the first thing I told you has to do with this... well the answer was that I realized that I've only told one person for real that I will always be there one way or another... yes, now you have the same thought I had.. My dear friend is that person. I don't know if there will be anyone waiting for me or if I could wait for someone... but if God could grant me that, I would wait for my friend just to make his transition a bit easier, just to take care of him once more before he meets his beloved ones.

I know I'm weird but what can I say?

" Not alone, I'll be there Tell me when you want to go.."