Always...

Don't you wake up sometimes wishing you could travel back in time and live again those days when you were immensely happy. Days when weather couldn't make you change the way you felt, no matter if it rained, snowed, or was a really sunny day... you just couldn't stop smiling. Maybe today is one of those days, I'm not saying I had a bad day, I didn't. It's just a natural longing for things you no longer have... and all of a sudden you remember... yes, how could you forget it? You realize that you don't need any machine to go back... you remember that all you have to do is close your eyes and bring those memories back. You know you might not be there for real, but you can even remember the smell, the breeze and it is as if you were there. You might not be today as happy as you used to be, but what a comfort it is to be able to hide anytime you need just for an instance... what a wonderful thing it is to feel that no matter what anyone or anything can do, they can't steal those moments. Yes, because they belong to you. And suddenly, you look at the sky and the sun seems brighter, the world isn't as cruel as you thought, and your soul now has the strength to move on for at least one more day...

"and I'll be there forever and a day... always"

Cold water

Mind, body and soul must have a balance so that life can go on easily or at least as swiftly as possible. As life moves on, the delicate balance between this 3 elements can be and is lost in a blink of an eye. It's hard to regain the equilibrium. I lost mine. My mind keeps telling to stay where I am, that I can't do what my body and soul ask for. My soul is aching and my body as well 'cause I'm realizing that I can't keep up with this... this terrible pain in me is yelling inside me, demanding to be set free at once. All this affliction maintain memories alive, feelings coming back to me, and even though I know there is nothing there for me... I can't help but wanting to be alone with my grief and with my love. A love stronger than than me, a love that is with me in every place I am.

I'm so sorry, but I think it's better for me to be alone now, I can't hurt you like I might do if all those emotions continue haunting me. I'm so sorry "T", I'm really trying but I'd rather let you go than make you a part of my breakdown. I do care for you, but I guess it's not enough. I'm sorry.

"Cold, cold water surrounds me now and all I've got is your hand. Lord, can you hear me now?... or am I lost?"